1 00:00:00,439 --> 00:00:02,466 I'm really glad I tried being with a girl. 2 00:00:02,467 --> 00:00:04,033 It was such an enlightening experience for me, 3 00:00:04,068 --> 00:00:06,135 you know, sexually and spiritually. 4 00:00:06,171 --> 00:00:08,103 I feel like I learned a lot about myself. 5 00:00:08,139 --> 00:00:09,238 What did you learn? 6 00:00:09,274 --> 00:00:11,541 I like a dick. I do. 7 00:00:11,576 --> 00:00:12,575 I... you know, it was great 8 00:00:12,610 --> 00:00:13,876 when she was going down on me, 9 00:00:13,911 --> 00:00:15,211 but you're already so good at that, 10 00:00:15,246 --> 00:00:16,712 that at a certain point, I was like, 11 00:00:16,747 --> 00:00:17,713 "Okay, penis please." 12 00:00:17,748 --> 00:00:19,815 But her kissing, wow. 13 00:00:19,850 --> 00:00:21,150 She was a revelation. 14 00:00:21,185 --> 00:00:22,918 - Revelation? - Oh, yeah. 15 00:00:22,953 --> 00:00:24,519 It was a whole other level. 16 00:00:24,555 --> 00:00:26,488 Other level different? Higher? 17 00:00:26,523 --> 00:00:27,489 Oh, God, way higher. 18 00:00:27,524 --> 00:00:28,991 She knows what girls like. 19 00:00:29,026 --> 00:00:30,659 Or at least she knows what this girl likes. 20 00:00:30,695 --> 00:00:32,027 Jeez, why didn't you tell me how bad I was? 21 00:00:32,063 --> 00:00:33,528 No, you're not bad. 22 00:00:33,564 --> 00:00:35,029 It's just she's insanely good. 23 00:00:35,065 --> 00:00:36,265 Well, that's totally unfair, 24 00:00:36,300 --> 00:00:37,432 'cause she's got gorgeous lips. 25 00:00:37,467 --> 00:00:38,766 I got thin lips. 26 00:00:38,802 --> 00:00:40,335 God, she does have gorgeous lips. 27 00:00:40,370 --> 00:00:41,703 They're like soft, juicy, luscious pillows. 28 00:00:41,738 --> 00:00:43,471 Christ, I got to start using Chapstick. 29 00:00:43,507 --> 00:00:46,341 Babe, babe, this is an area you can't compete on. 30 00:00:46,376 --> 00:00:48,876 She is a gorgeous girl who kisses other gorgeous girls 31 00:00:48,912 --> 00:00:51,478 all the time, she's like the gorgeous girl whisperer. 32 00:00:51,514 --> 00:00:53,414 Well, I want to be the best kisser you ever had. 33 00:00:53,449 --> 00:00:55,083 Oh. 34 00:00:55,118 --> 00:00:56,884 I want to start kissing you like a lesbian lover. 35 00:00:56,920 --> 00:00:58,385 Ew! 36 00:00:58,421 --> 00:00:59,687 Well, I thought that's what you want. 37 00:00:59,723 --> 00:01:01,655 No, I want you to kiss like a guy 38 00:01:01,691 --> 00:01:03,524 who learned how to kiss like a lesbian. 39 00:01:03,559 --> 00:01:05,326 Jesus Christ, how am I gonna do that? 40 00:01:05,361 --> 00:01:07,261 I'll take mental notes the next few times I kiss Davvy. 41 00:01:07,296 --> 00:01:08,696 We're gonna pretend to be a lesbian couple 42 00:01:08,731 --> 00:01:10,197 - for a little while. - Why? 43 00:01:10,233 --> 00:01:12,333 Because she has 47,000 followers on Instagram. 44 00:01:12,368 --> 00:01:13,367 That's why. 45 00:01:13,402 --> 00:01:14,368 I want waffles. 46 00:01:14,403 --> 00:01:15,469 You want waffles? 47 00:01:15,504 --> 00:01:16,837 Please take me. 48 00:01:19,542 --> 00:01:22,275 Sex and drugs and rock and roll 49 00:01:22,310 --> 00:01:23,343 All right 50 00:01:24,512 --> 00:01:26,146 All right 51 00:01:26,181 --> 00:01:28,514 'Cause I don't want to die 52 00:01:28,550 --> 00:01:30,183 Anonymous 53 00:01:30,219 --> 00:01:31,684 No, no 54 00:01:31,720 --> 00:01:33,586 No, no 55 00:01:33,622 --> 00:01:35,856 No, no 56 00:01:37,529 --> 00:01:40,575 - Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - -- www.Addic7ed.com -- 57 00:01:46,104 --> 00:01:48,286 _ 58 00:02:03,084 --> 00:02:06,218 We 59 00:02:06,254 --> 00:02:08,087 Never got control 60 00:02:08,122 --> 00:02:10,256 Lost the whole damn world 61 00:02:10,291 --> 00:02:13,392 Life 62 00:02:13,427 --> 00:02:15,860 Like a paradise 63 00:02:15,896 --> 00:02:19,898 It's just a paradise 64 00:02:19,944 --> 00:02:22,866 _ 65 00:02:22,867 --> 00:02:25,837 Visions, visions fading fast 66 00:02:25,872 --> 00:02:29,207 Crystals, crystals that never last 67 00:02:29,242 --> 00:02:32,043 Hello 68 00:02:32,078 --> 00:02:34,412 Who's this? 69 00:02:34,447 --> 00:02:36,580 Don't even worry about it 70 00:02:36,616 --> 00:02:39,284 I'll set up then I'll fail 71 00:02:39,319 --> 00:02:42,620 Mountains, crystals, that never last 72 00:02:42,655 --> 00:02:44,789 I need to know 73 00:02:44,824 --> 00:02:48,258 How you got this number 74 00:02:48,294 --> 00:02:50,628 I got it from a friend of a friend 75 00:02:50,663 --> 00:02:53,130 Of a friend of a friend of a friend 76 00:02:53,165 --> 00:02:55,999 Of a friend, a friend of a friend 77 00:02:56,035 --> 00:03:02,505 I need to hang up, I'm so sorry 78 00:03:02,541 --> 00:03:05,709 Hello 79 00:03:05,744 --> 00:03:10,413 Bye-bye 80 00:03:10,449 --> 00:03:13,050 [chuckles] That was really good. 81 00:03:13,085 --> 00:03:15,485 You want me to ask Davvy for oral sex advice. 82 00:03:15,520 --> 00:03:17,887 Gigi said she's amazing, like, the queen of cunnilingus. 83 00:03:17,922 --> 00:03:19,222 Okay, honey, I don't think you should be 84 00:03:19,257 --> 00:03:21,057 talking to Gigi about stuff like that, okay? 85 00:03:21,092 --> 00:03:23,125 That's not a normal mother-daughter area. 86 00:03:23,161 --> 00:03:24,794 We're not a normal mother-daughter, John. 87 00:03:24,830 --> 00:03:26,329 We have a very healthy relationship. 88 00:03:26,365 --> 00:03:28,064 She brought up the area. 89 00:03:28,099 --> 00:03:29,065 I made a mental note. 90 00:03:29,100 --> 00:03:30,132 Okay, but meanwhile, 91 00:03:30,168 --> 00:03:31,668 Davvy's still fake dating Gigi. 92 00:03:31,703 --> 00:03:33,002 I don't want to be in the kind of relationship 93 00:03:33,037 --> 00:03:34,337 where my real daughter finds out 94 00:03:34,372 --> 00:03:36,239 from her surrogate mom that her actual dad 95 00:03:36,274 --> 00:03:38,174 is lousy in bed. 96 00:03:38,209 --> 00:03:39,408 Did that even make sense? 97 00:03:39,443 --> 00:03:40,843 Yes. Unfortunately, it did. 98 00:03:40,879 --> 00:03:42,378 And you are not lousy in bed. 99 00:03:42,413 --> 00:03:44,680 You just need a little help, like most guys do. 100 00:03:44,715 --> 00:03:46,682 So what, I've been doing it wrong 101 00:03:46,717 --> 00:03:48,184 the last, like, 25 years? 102 00:03:48,219 --> 00:03:49,485 Oh, not the whole time. 103 00:03:49,520 --> 00:03:50,619 What does that mean? 104 00:03:50,654 --> 00:03:52,821 And you're always very... 105 00:03:52,857 --> 00:03:54,656 What? 106 00:03:54,692 --> 00:03:56,358 - Eager. - Oh, my God. 107 00:03:56,394 --> 00:03:57,893 And sometimes, you wander into 108 00:03:57,928 --> 00:03:59,628 some really great zones and rhythms 109 00:03:59,663 --> 00:04:01,063 - that really get me off. - Holy shit. 110 00:04:01,098 --> 00:04:02,931 Why not take the chance to sit down 111 00:04:02,966 --> 00:04:04,600 and learn something new that would make 112 00:04:04,635 --> 00:04:07,936 me orgasm every time? 113 00:04:07,971 --> 00:04:10,671 Well, first of all, because it's embarrassing 114 00:04:10,707 --> 00:04:13,408 to be asking people, you know, 115 00:04:13,443 --> 00:04:16,144 "Teach me how to give head, please." 116 00:04:19,082 --> 00:04:21,716 You could ask Flash. 117 00:04:21,751 --> 00:04:23,718 And why would I ask Flash? 118 00:04:23,753 --> 00:04:25,052 Oh, my God. Don't tell me. 119 00:04:25,087 --> 00:04:26,554 He's great at it, right? 120 00:04:26,589 --> 00:04:27,955 Okay. I won't tell you. 121 00:04:27,990 --> 00:04:29,524 Ugh, classic. Of course, of course. 122 00:04:29,559 --> 00:04:31,058 He's the king of cunnilingus, 123 00:04:31,093 --> 00:04:33,327 and I'm Johnny the eager little eighth grader. 124 00:04:33,362 --> 00:04:35,530 [groans] It is not a competition. 125 00:04:35,565 --> 00:04:37,131 You are good at kissing. 126 00:04:37,166 --> 00:04:38,666 He's good at oral sex. 127 00:04:38,701 --> 00:04:40,234 It's a tie, okay? 128 00:04:40,269 --> 00:04:41,868 But there's no question there's definitely 129 00:04:41,904 --> 00:04:45,472 more prestige in the oral sex area. 130 00:04:45,507 --> 00:04:47,207 Honey, honey, tell you what. 131 00:04:47,243 --> 00:04:48,442 Listen. 132 00:04:48,477 --> 00:04:49,743 Let me make you come right now, okay? 133 00:04:49,778 --> 00:04:51,178 I'm... no, listen to me. 134 00:04:51,213 --> 00:04:52,446 I'm totally pumped. I'm really psyched. 135 00:04:52,481 --> 00:04:54,381 I'm completely in the zone. 136 00:04:54,417 --> 00:04:57,751 I can make this happen right now. 137 00:04:57,786 --> 00:05:01,287 Too eager, I know, sorry, shit. 138 00:05:01,323 --> 00:05:03,022 I'm gonna talk to Davvy, okay? 139 00:05:03,058 --> 00:05:04,891 Make sure she doesn't say anything to Gigi, 140 00:05:04,927 --> 00:05:06,326 and then you are gonna sit down with her 141 00:05:06,361 --> 00:05:08,361 and get some very important information 142 00:05:08,396 --> 00:05:13,499 that we are gonna put to great use immediately. 143 00:05:13,534 --> 00:05:15,734 Do it for me. 144 00:05:15,770 --> 00:05:18,304 Do it for us. 145 00:05:18,340 --> 00:05:20,206 Please. 146 00:05:20,241 --> 00:05:22,008 All right. 147 00:05:22,043 --> 00:05:25,411 Ugh. 148 00:05:25,447 --> 00:05:26,946 You know what? Maybe... 149 00:05:26,982 --> 00:05:28,614 I just... I'm gonna do some deep research online. 150 00:05:28,649 --> 00:05:31,722 Because that way it'll just stay secret, hon. 151 00:05:34,419 --> 00:05:35,905 You afraid of change. 152 00:05:35,906 --> 00:05:37,233 - I'm afraid of change? - Yeah. 153 00:05:37,234 --> 00:05:38,968 You chickened out on the whole lesbian thing. 154 00:05:38,969 --> 00:05:40,101 I didn't chicken out. 155 00:05:40,102 --> 00:05:42,371 I turned into a lesbian, and then I turned back. 156 00:05:42,407 --> 00:05:44,674 That's two changes in less than 24 hours. 157 00:05:44,709 --> 00:05:46,509 Plus, I tried a new skin cream today, 158 00:05:46,545 --> 00:05:47,677 so that's actually three. 159 00:05:47,712 --> 00:05:49,245 - Right. - I want a change. 160 00:05:49,280 --> 00:05:50,679 I want a passion. 161 00:05:50,714 --> 00:05:52,181 I want something that consumes me, you know? 162 00:05:52,216 --> 00:05:53,682 What do you mean? 163 00:05:53,717 --> 00:05:54,917 You should dance. You should be a dance teacher. 164 00:05:54,952 --> 00:05:56,519 Oh. I'd... 165 00:05:56,554 --> 00:05:58,120 - You love to dance! - That's a great idea! 166 00:05:58,156 --> 00:05:59,388 Yeah, but you know what, I don't think you can just 167 00:05:59,424 --> 00:06:00,822 become a dance teacher, honey. 168 00:06:00,858 --> 00:06:02,024 I think you got to get, like, certified. 169 00:06:02,060 --> 00:06:03,492 John, I went to school for dance. 170 00:06:03,528 --> 00:06:04,893 I trained as a dancer. I was gonna be a dancer 171 00:06:04,929 --> 00:06:06,395 until I met you, and I am goddamn good at it. 172 00:06:06,431 --> 00:06:07,829 - And you know what? - Hmm? 173 00:06:07,865 --> 00:06:09,631 Will you kill me? I really want sushi. 174 00:06:09,667 --> 00:06:10,966 - No, we don't need waffles. - Okay, yeah. 175 00:06:11,001 --> 00:06:12,734 The waffle place is... 176 00:06:12,770 --> 00:06:14,736 I just want something big in my life, you know? 177 00:06:14,772 --> 00:06:16,404 Like I made a difference. 178 00:06:16,440 --> 00:06:17,906 Like Habitat for Humanity? 179 00:06:17,942 --> 00:06:19,702 No, not a difference in the world at large, 180 00:06:19,710 --> 00:06:21,376 a difference in my world. 181 00:06:21,411 --> 00:06:23,411 I blew my chance saving the planet 182 00:06:23,447 --> 00:06:25,080 'cause I was too busy blowing your father 183 00:06:25,115 --> 00:06:26,714 literally and emotionally, 184 00:06:26,749 --> 00:06:28,416 always putting his dreams out in front. 185 00:06:28,452 --> 00:06:29,884 Okay, let's be honest. 186 00:06:29,919 --> 00:06:31,386 It's always been kind of a two-way street, 187 00:06:31,421 --> 00:06:32,853 like mutual support kind of thing. 188 00:06:32,889 --> 00:06:35,457 Oh, really? Mutual two-way street thing 189 00:06:35,492 --> 00:06:37,292 going on, you mean where you were out in front 190 00:06:37,294 --> 00:06:39,214 being the star in the spotlight, and I was shoved 191 00:06:39,229 --> 00:06:41,028 in the back, like, barely lit? 192 00:06:41,064 --> 00:06:43,864 No, honey, this has been a one-way street, okay? 193 00:06:43,900 --> 00:06:45,466 Me driving you. 194 00:06:45,501 --> 00:06:47,034 You're a 50-year-old man 195 00:06:47,070 --> 00:06:49,470 who still acts like a 15-year-old boy, 196 00:06:49,505 --> 00:06:53,407 and I'm a 45-year-old woman who acts... 197 00:06:53,442 --> 00:06:55,309 Like a 45-year-old woman. 198 00:06:55,344 --> 00:06:56,643 Okay. 199 00:06:56,678 --> 00:06:57,911 - Honey? - Oh, my God. 200 00:06:57,946 --> 00:06:59,546 - Let's relax. - No, no, no, no, no. 201 00:06:59,582 --> 00:07:01,102 If you think about it, when we talked 202 00:07:01,117 --> 00:07:03,350 about you being the lead singer or just going out 203 00:07:03,385 --> 00:07:04,985 like that one gig where you had to sing, 204 00:07:04,987 --> 00:07:06,953 like, three songs in a row, you had massive panic attacks. 205 00:07:06,989 --> 00:07:08,589 I know, I know. John, I know, okay? 206 00:07:08,624 --> 00:07:10,957 I know, I just... I wanted... I wanted something 207 00:07:10,993 --> 00:07:12,273 different for my life, you know? 208 00:07:12,294 --> 00:07:13,693 That's all I'm saying. 209 00:07:13,729 --> 00:07:15,729 I thought everything was gonna be different. 210 00:07:15,764 --> 00:07:17,263 You're okay. 211 00:07:17,298 --> 00:07:18,732 It's okay. 212 00:07:18,767 --> 00:07:19,866 You want waffles? 213 00:07:19,901 --> 00:07:21,400 Yes, waffles. Let's go. 214 00:07:21,436 --> 00:07:23,569 But, guys, the sushi joint is right here. 215 00:07:23,605 --> 00:07:24,971 Oh, my God, John, this is exactly 216 00:07:25,007 --> 00:07:26,305 what we're talking about, okay? 217 00:07:26,341 --> 00:07:29,808 You never want to try anything new. 218 00:07:29,844 --> 00:07:31,043 Thanks for doing this, Davvy. 219 00:07:31,078 --> 00:07:32,311 I really appreciate it. 220 00:07:32,347 --> 00:07:33,779 Well, I believe in pussy karma. 221 00:07:33,814 --> 00:07:35,648 You get great head by putting great head 222 00:07:35,683 --> 00:07:37,650 out into the oral sex universe. 223 00:07:37,685 --> 00:07:39,152 Plus, my pottery class was canceled. 224 00:07:39,187 --> 00:07:42,255 So here we are. 225 00:07:42,290 --> 00:07:44,290 Wow, that's the most realistic drawing 226 00:07:44,325 --> 00:07:45,858 of a vagina I've ever seen in my life. 227 00:07:45,893 --> 00:07:47,693 - Thank you. - Oh, you drew it? 228 00:07:47,728 --> 00:07:48,761 An ex of mine did. 229 00:07:48,796 --> 00:07:49,762 She's an artist. 230 00:07:49,797 --> 00:07:50,829 But it's my vagina. 231 00:07:50,865 --> 00:07:52,297 Oh. 232 00:07:52,332 --> 00:07:54,633 Well, it's... 233 00:07:54,669 --> 00:07:55,834 magnificent. 234 00:07:55,870 --> 00:07:57,202 It's a good pussy. I know. 235 00:07:57,237 --> 00:07:59,204 - I'm blessed. - Yeah. 236 00:07:59,239 --> 00:08:00,739 Yeah. 237 00:08:00,775 --> 00:08:05,043 So why am I staring at a drawing of your pussy? 238 00:08:05,078 --> 00:08:06,611 Listen, you're a race car driver, 239 00:08:06,647 --> 00:08:08,146 you want to know an engine inside and out, 240 00:08:08,182 --> 00:08:09,947 - what makes it run best, right? - Right. 241 00:08:09,983 --> 00:08:12,484 And every engine's the same, but also individual, 242 00:08:12,519 --> 00:08:14,619 just like vaginas. 243 00:08:14,655 --> 00:08:16,454 So you might have a little extra size here, 244 00:08:16,490 --> 00:08:19,190 a little less action there, but basically, 245 00:08:19,225 --> 00:08:20,591 each pussy has all the same parts. 246 00:08:20,626 --> 00:08:21,993 Right, but you know I, uh... 247 00:08:22,028 --> 00:08:23,427 I've been in several notable New York City 248 00:08:23,462 --> 00:08:24,929 rock bands over the years. 249 00:08:24,964 --> 00:08:26,597 I've slept with a lot of chicks, so, you know... 250 00:08:26,632 --> 00:08:28,866 Sure, yeah, but, you know, just because you're fat, 251 00:08:28,902 --> 00:08:31,969 doesn't make you a chef, hmm? 252 00:08:32,005 --> 00:08:33,365 Let me ask you a couple questions. 253 00:08:33,372 --> 00:08:34,872 Can I ask one question before you start? 254 00:08:34,908 --> 00:08:36,207 Sure. 255 00:08:36,242 --> 00:08:40,344 Is, uh... is that part on every girl? 256 00:08:40,379 --> 00:08:42,179 This is gonna take longer than I thought. 257 00:08:52,091 --> 00:08:53,824 Mm-mm, no. 258 00:08:53,859 --> 00:08:55,491 No, I'm sorry. No. 259 00:08:55,527 --> 00:08:57,060 That's what I was telling you about. 260 00:08:57,096 --> 00:08:59,029 It's too much tongue way too early. 261 00:08:59,064 --> 00:09:00,530 Too much tongue, okay. 262 00:09:00,565 --> 00:09:01,798 It's okay, relax. 263 00:09:01,834 --> 00:09:03,100 There's no rush. 264 00:09:03,135 --> 00:09:04,500 Just... you know the amount of time you take 265 00:09:04,536 --> 00:09:05,769 when you're going down on me? 266 00:09:05,804 --> 00:09:06,837 - Yes. - Okay. 267 00:09:06,872 --> 00:09:08,138 So it's like the same thing. 268 00:09:08,173 --> 00:09:09,839 You know, just nice and easy. 269 00:09:09,874 --> 00:09:11,708 Soft and slow. 270 00:09:11,743 --> 00:09:13,376 - Okay? - Okay. 271 00:09:13,411 --> 00:09:14,844 Okay. 272 00:09:18,049 --> 00:09:19,549 What are you doing? 273 00:09:19,584 --> 00:09:20,816 I don't know. 274 00:09:20,852 --> 00:09:24,387 I feel like I'm kissing a statue. 275 00:09:24,422 --> 00:09:26,021 Goddamn you, Flash! 276 00:09:26,057 --> 00:09:28,224 - It's fine. - It's not fine. 277 00:09:28,259 --> 00:09:29,725 Look, I think you're overthinking it now. 278 00:09:29,761 --> 00:09:31,426 Why don't we just... let's just fuck, 279 00:09:31,462 --> 00:09:33,162 and let's just forget about kissing, okay? 280 00:09:33,197 --> 00:09:35,117 - No more kissing. - Well, that ain't gonna happen. 281 00:09:35,133 --> 00:09:36,453 'Cause I'm hung up on the kissing, 282 00:09:36,467 --> 00:09:39,034 and so is Magic Johnson. 283 00:09:39,070 --> 00:09:40,369 Really? 284 00:09:40,404 --> 00:09:41,670 So unfair. 285 00:09:41,705 --> 00:09:42,671 I just want to kiss you like her. 286 00:09:42,706 --> 00:09:44,339 Why can't I learn? 287 00:09:44,375 --> 00:09:47,942 Well, I love how emotionally available 288 00:09:47,978 --> 00:09:49,278 you are right now. 289 00:09:49,313 --> 00:09:50,979 Well, I'm evolving, honey. 290 00:09:55,786 --> 00:09:56,985 Well, you may be evolving, 291 00:09:57,020 --> 00:09:58,887 but your dick is still stuck in caveman mode. 292 00:09:58,922 --> 00:10:00,488 Thank God. 293 00:10:03,493 --> 00:10:05,226 Oh, yeah. 294 00:10:05,262 --> 00:10:07,996 - Oh, give me a kiss. - Uh-uh! 295 00:10:08,031 --> 00:10:11,632 No kissing. 296 00:10:11,668 --> 00:10:13,296 Do it again. 297 00:10:17,607 --> 00:10:20,341 Pour a little champagne, bang, heart attack 298 00:10:20,376 --> 00:10:22,677 Trying to run for you, can't catch us 299 00:10:22,712 --> 00:10:25,946 We'll never stop even if it kills us 300 00:10:25,981 --> 00:10:28,449 Caffeine, nicotine, sex, pills 301 00:10:28,484 --> 00:10:30,951 We do it for the thrills 302 00:10:30,986 --> 00:10:33,353 Try to run for you, can't catch us 303 00:10:33,388 --> 00:10:36,456 We'll never stop even if it kills us 304 00:10:36,491 --> 00:10:39,059 Alcohol, fireworks, dollar bills 305 00:10:39,094 --> 00:10:41,862 We do it for the thrills 306 00:10:41,897 --> 00:10:44,397 Sippin' till we high, sip, sippin' till we high 307 00:10:44,433 --> 00:10:46,800 Sippin' till we high, sip, sippin' till we high 308 00:10:46,836 --> 00:10:49,235 So I want to introduce you to my best friend 309 00:10:49,270 --> 00:10:52,539 A-D-R-E-N-A-L-I-N-E adrenaline 310 00:10:52,574 --> 00:10:53,906 Gigi and Johnny just finished the lyrics. 311 00:10:53,942 --> 00:10:55,141 They want to do a full rehearsal. 312 00:10:55,176 --> 00:10:56,543 Okay, great, I'll get my bag. 313 00:10:56,578 --> 00:10:57,744 Why didn't you tell me I was a bad kisser 314 00:10:57,779 --> 00:10:59,011 when you were seeing me? 315 00:10:59,047 --> 00:11:01,113 Uh, didn't have time? 316 00:11:01,149 --> 00:11:03,616 A whole goddamn year? 317 00:11:03,652 --> 00:11:05,284 Okay, you got to remember, 318 00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:07,053 I had just left Johnny Rock. 319 00:11:07,088 --> 00:11:09,355 Whose ego is so delicate, you tell him his hair 320 00:11:09,390 --> 00:11:11,790 looks weird, and his dick doesn't work for a week. 321 00:11:11,826 --> 00:11:13,625 I didn't want to take the chance of saying 322 00:11:13,661 --> 00:11:15,194 the wrong thing to you and then having 323 00:11:15,230 --> 00:11:18,464 to spend the next seven days reconvincing your cock. 324 00:11:18,499 --> 00:11:20,666 Besides, you gave such great head, 325 00:11:20,701 --> 00:11:22,167 I didn't care about the kissing. 326 00:11:22,202 --> 00:11:23,335 Thanks. 327 00:11:23,371 --> 00:11:25,036 Gigi's giving me notes, 328 00:11:25,072 --> 00:11:27,406 and every time she wants to practice, I panic. 329 00:11:27,441 --> 00:11:29,074 Okay, well, you got to figure that shit out, 330 00:11:29,109 --> 00:11:30,342 or she's gonna dump your ass. 331 00:11:30,378 --> 00:11:31,744 I know. 332 00:11:31,779 --> 00:11:33,111 This is about Gigi's happiness. 333 00:11:33,146 --> 00:11:36,014 I know. 334 00:11:36,049 --> 00:11:37,849 Do you want to practice on me? 335 00:11:37,885 --> 00:11:39,450 Huh? 336 00:11:39,486 --> 00:11:41,719 Well, I mean, who knows your history of kissing 337 00:11:41,755 --> 00:11:43,721 better than I do? 338 00:11:43,757 --> 00:11:45,390 - Ava, come on. - Purely clinical. 339 00:11:45,425 --> 00:11:47,926 Like a lab test. 340 00:11:47,961 --> 00:11:49,460 Oh, my God, you're making it weird. 341 00:11:49,496 --> 00:11:52,130 Just kiss me. Come here. Jesus. 342 00:11:52,165 --> 00:11:54,652 Okay, all right. 343 00:11:57,998 --> 00:12:00,132 - You ready? - Yeah. 344 00:12:11,545 --> 00:12:14,980 Yeah. That's better. 345 00:12:15,015 --> 00:12:17,149 One note, okay? 346 00:12:17,184 --> 00:12:19,151 You need a dash of supple. 347 00:12:19,186 --> 00:12:21,119 You got to relax your lower lip a little more. 348 00:12:21,155 --> 00:12:24,222 It's still too active. 349 00:12:24,257 --> 00:12:25,490 Okay. Try again? 350 00:12:25,525 --> 00:12:28,459 Yeah. 351 00:12:28,495 --> 00:12:30,228 - You ready? - Yeah. 352 00:12:52,952 --> 00:12:56,120 [clears throat] 353 00:12:56,155 --> 00:12:58,388 Yeah, that... technically perfect. 354 00:12:58,424 --> 00:13:00,691 - Thanks. - Mm-hmm, you're welcome. 355 00:13:03,862 --> 00:13:05,495 What are we supposed to be doing? 356 00:13:05,531 --> 00:13:07,497 - Kissing. - Uh, no, rehearsal. 357 00:13:07,533 --> 00:13:08,898 That's right. 358 00:13:08,934 --> 00:13:11,201 We're going, um, to rehearsal. 359 00:13:11,237 --> 00:13:13,937 - Get my bag. - Okay. 360 00:13:13,972 --> 00:13:15,405 I'll get my bag. 361 00:13:20,779 --> 00:13:23,512 Feast, you want to call the show Feast. 362 00:13:23,548 --> 00:13:24,748 I know. 363 00:13:24,783 --> 00:13:25,782 Brilliant, right? 364 00:13:25,817 --> 00:13:27,250 Well, it's not brilliant. 365 00:13:27,285 --> 00:13:29,385 It's the exact opposite of Famine. 366 00:13:29,420 --> 00:13:31,420 It's tastefully ironic. 367 00:13:31,456 --> 00:13:32,688 I like it. 368 00:13:32,724 --> 00:13:34,790 - I love it. - Of course you love it. 369 00:13:34,825 --> 00:13:36,425 It sounds like there's going to be a buffet. 370 00:13:36,461 --> 00:13:37,860 That was mean. 371 00:13:37,895 --> 00:13:39,862 I love it because it's good. 372 00:13:39,897 --> 00:13:41,530 It's memorable. It's got a great ring to it. 373 00:13:41,566 --> 00:13:42,865 That's why I like it. 374 00:13:42,900 --> 00:13:44,260 Thank you, and you guys are gonna 375 00:13:44,269 --> 00:13:45,701 need a title that invites the audience 376 00:13:45,737 --> 00:13:47,136 into the theater, right? 377 00:13:47,171 --> 00:13:49,104 Hey, who remembers seeing Sting's musical, 378 00:13:49,140 --> 00:13:50,438 "The Last Ship"? 379 00:13:50,474 --> 00:13:51,673 - No. - Never heard of it. 380 00:13:51,708 --> 00:13:53,175 Neither did anyone else. 381 00:13:53,210 --> 00:13:54,476 I mean, you guys want people to 382 00:13:54,511 --> 00:13:57,179 - come and see the show, correct? - Yeah. 383 00:13:57,214 --> 00:13:59,054 I want the right people to come see our show. 384 00:13:59,083 --> 00:14:00,949 Rehab, no one knows what An Gorta Mor means. 385 00:14:00,985 --> 00:14:02,450 Irish people know. 386 00:14:02,486 --> 00:14:04,219 Educated people know. 387 00:14:04,255 --> 00:14:06,554 Okay, well, I asked an Irish friend of mine 388 00:14:06,590 --> 00:14:07,922 who teaches at NYU. 389 00:14:07,957 --> 00:14:09,257 You know what he thought An Gorta Mor was? 390 00:14:09,293 --> 00:14:10,525 A thyroid medication. 391 00:14:10,560 --> 00:14:12,260 What do they teach? Shop? 392 00:14:12,296 --> 00:14:14,596 The original title of "Hamilton" was "Burr." 393 00:14:14,631 --> 00:14:16,230 Because it was so cold back then. 394 00:14:16,266 --> 00:14:18,300 No, Bam, no, because no one 395 00:14:18,335 --> 00:14:20,067 wanted to see a show about Aaron Burr. 396 00:14:20,103 --> 00:14:22,170 No one wants to see a show about a fucking ship, 397 00:14:22,205 --> 00:14:24,172 and no one wants to look up words 398 00:14:24,207 --> 00:14:25,907 on a Gaelic-to-English online dictionary 399 00:14:25,942 --> 00:14:27,909 before they go buy a $200 ticket. 400 00:14:27,944 --> 00:14:30,511 We are trying to make a dark, edgy, 401 00:14:30,546 --> 00:14:33,815 real song cycle meets rock opera production here. 402 00:14:33,850 --> 00:14:36,117 We want to make "Hamilton" look like a puppet show. 403 00:14:36,152 --> 00:14:37,685 Right, but none of it matters 404 00:14:37,720 --> 00:14:40,321 unless you a get a full house on opening night. 405 00:14:40,356 --> 00:14:42,856 I got you, as composer and creator, 406 00:14:42,891 --> 00:14:44,758 a 4% piece of the box office. 407 00:14:44,794 --> 00:14:47,127 That is unheard of for someone in your position. 408 00:14:47,162 --> 00:14:49,996 But 4% of nothing is zero, Rehab. 409 00:14:50,032 --> 00:14:52,299 Think about it. 410 00:14:52,335 --> 00:14:54,267 Feast. 411 00:14:54,303 --> 00:14:55,636 Feast. 412 00:15:00,209 --> 00:15:03,243 Hmm. 413 00:15:03,278 --> 00:15:06,813 You know what you could call the show? 414 00:15:06,849 --> 00:15:08,982 Go fuck yourself. 415 00:15:09,017 --> 00:15:10,617 Noah, you are supposed to be the new Jew, 416 00:15:10,652 --> 00:15:13,519 but instead you're acting like the old Jew. 417 00:15:13,555 --> 00:15:16,956 And you are supposed to be a creative genius 418 00:15:16,991 --> 00:15:20,660 sent here to help me realize my vision on stage. 419 00:15:20,695 --> 00:15:23,195 But nope. No. 420 00:15:23,231 --> 00:15:27,767 Instead, you are two typical show business Jews... 421 00:15:27,802 --> 00:15:30,069 you know what I mean... sent to ruin 422 00:15:30,104 --> 00:15:33,305 another Jew's musical endeavor. 423 00:15:33,341 --> 00:15:35,007 You know what? That's a good name for this show. 424 00:15:35,042 --> 00:15:36,141 Jewsical. 425 00:15:36,177 --> 00:15:37,337 Oh, my God, stop saying Jew. 426 00:15:37,345 --> 00:15:38,345 You say Jew all the time. 427 00:15:38,379 --> 00:15:39,578 Stop saying Jew so much. 428 00:15:39,613 --> 00:15:44,083 Jew, Jew, Jew, Jew, Jew. 429 00:15:44,118 --> 00:15:46,150 Feast blows. 430 00:15:46,186 --> 00:15:48,353 Almost as much as the two of you. 431 00:15:48,389 --> 00:15:51,923 I've got something called artistic integrity, my friends. 432 00:15:51,958 --> 00:15:53,925 Look that up online. 433 00:15:53,960 --> 00:15:55,827 Feast on this. 434 00:15:55,863 --> 00:15:58,162 - Now, just... - Shut up! 435 00:15:58,198 --> 00:16:01,299 Feast was Campbell Scott's idea. 436 00:16:01,334 --> 00:16:03,201 Whoa, whoa, whoa, did you say Campbell Scott? 437 00:16:03,236 --> 00:16:04,869 The Campbell Scott? 438 00:16:04,905 --> 00:16:06,871 He's from the royal family of American theater. 439 00:16:06,907 --> 00:16:09,807 His father's George C. Scott, Patton. 440 00:16:09,842 --> 00:16:13,544 Rehab, this guy does Shakespeare, bro. 441 00:16:13,579 --> 00:16:16,214 Campbell Scott is the real goddamn deal, right? 442 00:16:16,249 --> 00:16:19,082 That's great. 443 00:16:19,118 --> 00:16:21,685 You just heard your name and Shakespeare's name 444 00:16:21,721 --> 00:16:22,920 in the same sentence. 445 00:16:22,955 --> 00:16:26,490 How often does that happen? 446 00:16:26,526 --> 00:16:28,759 Campbell Scott gives your production 447 00:16:28,795 --> 00:16:32,390 immediate and legitimate artistic integrity. 448 00:16:38,070 --> 00:16:41,871 Do you still remember December's foggy freeze, 449 00:16:41,907 --> 00:16:44,774 when the ice that clung onto your beard 450 00:16:44,810 --> 00:16:48,518 was screaming agony? 451 00:16:49,915 --> 00:16:53,583 "Hamlet" is my favorite play. 452 00:16:53,618 --> 00:16:55,652 I am totally in. 453 00:16:55,687 --> 00:16:57,219 Yes! 454 00:16:57,255 --> 00:16:58,588 That's not "Hamlet." 455 00:16:58,623 --> 00:17:01,223 Bro, did the play in college. 456 00:17:01,259 --> 00:17:02,692 I think I know "Hamlet." 457 00:17:02,727 --> 00:17:05,095 Yeah, it's Jethro Tull, "Aqualung." 458 00:17:16,899 --> 00:17:24,205 Don't break me too like they did to you 459 00:17:24,240 --> 00:17:28,575 Don't break me too 460 00:17:28,611 --> 00:17:30,543 Oh-oh-oh 461 00:17:30,579 --> 00:17:32,646 'Cause I'll make it through 462 00:17:32,681 --> 00:17:34,414 With or without you 463 00:17:34,449 --> 00:17:41,554 So go and throw it all away 464 00:17:41,590 --> 00:17:47,327 Whoa, change 465 00:17:47,362 --> 00:17:50,597 Ooh 466 00:17:50,632 --> 00:17:53,366 467 00:17:53,401 --> 00:17:56,336 [cheers and applause] 468 00:17:57,939 --> 00:17:59,772 Thank you. 469 00:17:59,807 --> 00:18:02,441 All right, now I'd like to welcome a very special guest. 470 00:18:02,476 --> 00:18:04,543 She's gonna come up here and sing a song for you. 471 00:18:04,578 --> 00:18:06,112 [cheering] 472 00:18:06,147 --> 00:18:08,614 Please welcome Ava Delaney. 473 00:18:08,650 --> 00:18:11,550 [cheers and applause] 474 00:18:11,585 --> 00:18:13,352 [mumbles] A minor. 475 00:18:17,191 --> 00:18:18,323 - Good. - You ready? 476 00:18:18,359 --> 00:18:19,991 One, two, three! 477 00:18:20,027 --> 00:18:22,994 [relaxed rock music] 478 00:18:23,030 --> 00:18:25,894 479 00:18:30,371 --> 00:18:34,873 Diamond rings don't mean a thing 480 00:18:34,908 --> 00:18:39,510 Not impressed by the places you've been 481 00:18:39,546 --> 00:18:43,614 Nothing changed since you've been gone 482 00:18:43,650 --> 00:18:47,952 Time to get you back where you belong 483 00:18:47,988 --> 00:18:51,088 With me 484 00:18:51,123 --> 00:18:53,724 You belong to me 485 00:18:53,759 --> 00:18:58,028 486 00:18:58,064 --> 00:19:02,766 Got your scent on the nape of my neck 487 00:19:02,802 --> 00:19:07,037 Gonna give you as good as it gets 488 00:19:07,073 --> 00:19:11,541 Hush, now, honey, gonna welcome you home 489 00:19:11,577 --> 00:19:18,515 Right back here where you belong to me 490 00:19:18,550 --> 00:19:23,253 Hush, hush, hush 491 00:19:23,288 --> 00:19:26,155 Hush, hush 492 00:19:26,191 --> 00:19:30,827 Don't matter what you was after 493 00:19:30,862 --> 00:19:34,664 Searching the world 494 00:19:34,700 --> 00:19:39,436 'Cause all that hollow chitter chatter 495 00:19:39,471 --> 00:19:44,240 Brought you right back to your original girl 496 00:19:44,275 --> 00:19:49,045 497 00:19:49,080 --> 00:19:51,614 Hey, to Ava! A star is born. 498 00:19:51,649 --> 00:19:53,582 Oh, no, no, a shooting star, maybe. 499 00:19:53,618 --> 00:19:55,284 Ava, you killed it, okay? 500 00:19:55,319 --> 00:19:56,585 We need to get you out front more. 501 00:19:56,621 --> 00:19:58,420 You need to be singing a song at night. 502 00:19:58,456 --> 00:20:00,389 And we have to come up with a great stage name, you know, 503 00:20:00,424 --> 00:20:02,157 like Johnny Rock or Flash. 504 00:20:02,192 --> 00:20:03,392 Flava Ava. 505 00:20:03,427 --> 00:20:04,460 No, no, no, I got it. 506 00:20:04,495 --> 00:20:06,662 I got it. Ava Del Riva. 507 00:20:06,697 --> 00:20:09,231 What about just Ava? 508 00:20:09,267 --> 00:20:11,066 Like Sia, but Ava. 509 00:20:11,101 --> 00:20:12,067 - No, no, no. - Ava X. 510 00:20:12,102 --> 00:20:13,935 - Ava X! - That's it. 511 00:20:13,971 --> 00:20:15,070 Yes! 512 00:20:15,105 --> 00:20:16,504 - Oh! - I like that. 513 00:20:16,539 --> 00:20:18,506 I'm dating Ava X. 514 00:20:18,541 --> 00:20:19,581 What do you think of that? 515 00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:21,026 Cheers, cheers, cheers! 516 00:20:21,027 --> 00:20:22,878 - Yeah! - Ava X. 517 00:20:32,845 --> 00:20:33,811 That was good. 518 00:20:33,846 --> 00:20:36,814 It was... that was very good. 519 00:20:36,849 --> 00:20:38,048 Not better? 520 00:20:38,084 --> 00:20:41,819 It was better. 521 00:20:41,854 --> 00:20:44,321 There was, like, no tongue action. 522 00:20:44,356 --> 00:20:46,657 I thought you didn't like tongue action. 523 00:20:46,692 --> 00:20:47,992 I do. I like it. 524 00:20:48,027 --> 00:20:49,226 I just like it delayed. 525 00:20:49,261 --> 00:20:50,594 How delayed? 526 00:20:50,630 --> 00:20:52,896 I don't know, like a minute or two? 527 00:20:52,932 --> 00:20:55,165 But not the whole tongue, just a little bit. 528 00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:56,899 - How little? - I don't... 529 00:20:56,935 --> 00:21:00,203 Just like a tiny little flick, sometimes more, 530 00:21:00,239 --> 00:21:04,741 other times less, other times way less. 531 00:21:04,776 --> 00:21:08,077 - Are you upset? - No, just confused. 532 00:21:21,960 --> 00:21:26,328 Oh, hello, Dr. Pavlov. 533 00:21:26,364 --> 00:21:28,063 [moaning] 534 00:21:28,098 --> 00:21:29,464 Oh, yes. 535 00:21:29,499 --> 00:21:31,399 Oh, Johnny. 536 00:21:31,434 --> 00:21:33,934 Oh, no, no, no, no, no... don't stop. 537 00:21:33,970 --> 00:21:35,770 I was just coming up for some air, honey. 538 00:21:35,805 --> 00:21:37,172 Oh, my God, I can't believe it's 539 00:21:37,207 --> 00:21:39,674 taken you this long to find that spot. 540 00:21:39,709 --> 00:21:43,178 Oh, you could have given me a little direction. 541 00:21:43,213 --> 00:21:46,013 I didn't even know it was there. 542 00:21:46,049 --> 00:21:47,314 Yeah, there you go. 543 00:21:47,349 --> 00:21:49,016 Oh, yeah. 544 00:21:49,052 --> 00:21:50,818 Oh, that spot... that's... yeah, that spot... 545 00:21:50,853 --> 00:21:52,519 that spot's... oh, yeah. 546 00:21:52,555 --> 00:21:54,689 Oh, Johnny. [chuckles] 547 00:21:57,598 --> 00:22:02,216 - Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - --